Monday, March 30, 2015

Dude, what if there was a Tech Deck MMO...?

Games these days are pretty cool, but they'd be even cooler if they added the best, most rad finger-controlled extreme sport ever: Tech Deck.
Via Finga Fingerboards
Now, I know what you're saying. You're like "But bro! There's already a Tech Deck game for Game Boy Color! What more could you possibly want!?".
Strangely, you play as a ball sack rather than a finger in this game.
Well, hold onto your board, because you're about to drop everything when you imagine the potential of a Tech Deck MMORPG.

First of all, the game would need some character customization. You'd play as a disembodied middle and index finger, which would of course be able to be customized to be male or female, have different skin tones, vary in girth, and have totally righteous nail polish (although this might be reserved for equipment drops and expensive DLC).
Think Thumb Thumbs from Spy Kids.
The most important thing would of course be the fingerboards themselves. You'd start out with some boring generic board, but as you progressed, leveled up, and completed quests, you'd be able to earn new designs for the underside, new wheel colors (even glowing ones!), and, well, that's about it. But new boards and modifications would have different stats for influencing the top speed, acceleration, jump height, stability during grinds, and more! The quests would mostly consist of performing certain tricks a few hundred thousand times or collecting arbitrary items scattered over the skate park (which is the whole world, by the way). Apart from quests, the best way to level up would, of course, be to grind. I heard that MMO players liked grinding, so in this game, you can level grind while you grind on rails for hours on end.

But wait, there's more! The content of this hypothetical game just doubled because I'm throwing in Tech Deck scooters as a separate player class! No worries though, because you can change your class at any time (for the small cost of $10 per change).
Now, you may be wondering what the point of making this game an MMO is. You could do all this without any other players, right? Well, making it online means that you can bump into other people and wait in lines! On top of that, there'd be PvP fingerboard jousting on half pipes and flicking battles. So... uh... that's why.

Really, who wouldn't buy this game? If you have more ideas for a Tech Deck MMO, let me know in the comments!

-Thanks to Bryan S. for the idea of this post.

For more ridiculous game concepts, check out how I'd turn the Firefly series into games or even the Bible!
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